Transitions…
September 26, 2008
It has been quite sometime since I’ve written here. Things have changed a lot since I last visited you all. The band I’ve played in and worked hard for over the past three years has dissolved. Luckily this had nothing to do with band dynamics or relationships, rather a lack of progression. A lack of success that would enable us to have our monetary and security needs fulfilled in a way that is fitting at this point in our lives. It was a combination of squandered promotions, lack of management, too much touring with little to no reward, and a hope lost. We could’ve kept going and recorded another record and toured more and hoped, but none of had it in us to try it all over again.
As you can imagine this was not a decision that reached a conclusion easily or quickly. I can say that I really feel this is supposed to happen. Its been an amazing journey and now its time to move on. This change has been brewing in my heart for a few months now, but the finality of it all has been a bit overwhelming. I’ve been going back and forth between excitement for the future and mourning a dream lost. The pursuit of music as a vocation has been my only drive for about 9 years. Now that I’ve found myself on the other side of the dream, I can’t help but question things. Did I chase the wrong thing? Is this what the “dream” looked like? Why didn’t it pan out like I’d thought it would?
I’m still processing all of this, but I do know one thing: I’ve been led to this point for a reason and in that I sit. I come back to Sovereignty. The beautiful reality that my story, my life and its is many different, sometimes confusing, parts masterfully woven together. This is what I cling to as I move forward eagerly anticipating what He has next for Kristin and I. I’m now realizing what the sense of preparation was for a few months ago.
The next step for me is school. I’m beginning the whole application process for USC and moving forward with that. I’m really excited to get started. I really hated high school, but I really enjoyed the one semester I was in college…so I’m ready to get on it. I will keep you updated and will try to blog more consistently, I just needed sometime to process all of these changes.
Well written Chad and yes I care. You are a insightful man and one who sees what is true and worthwhile in life. I think it takes some real maturity to process your circumstances like you’re doing. We serve a good God and Sarah and I will pray for you and Kristin and this unknown future that both our families face. Look forward to our next rendezvous and tell Kristin we said hello.
Will
Hey Chad-wow! I can’t believe that you are going back to school. I will be praying for you and your wife as you make this transition and the many transitions to come. (even though you are going to the WRONG! school) I hope that school goes well and that studying isn’t too hard. Take care and tell Kristin hello for me.